Wait, You’re Having a 3rd? Child?

“You’re going to be fine,” my friend stammers going into panic after I inform him my wife was pregnant with our third child. “Just know we’re here for you.”   “I mean, it’s shocking, but I’m not like that ups-“ “A lot of these things at your guys’ age don’t even take. You might be…

10 Tips For Potty Training That Work 37% of the Time

Potty training your child may sound easy. It’s not. It’s like any other form of art. You must be creative, imaginative, patient, and dedicated to the craft.  And just when you think your canvas is fully complete, you look up and you’ve got poop all over yourself. In other words, it really sucks. The first…

A Starving Father at Costco

  The sun’s piercing rays snuck around the edge of my car door as I pushed it open, blinding me momentarily. Planting my feet on the sun-drenched concrete, I gazed out upon the dozen of rows of cars and abandoned, colossal shopping carts. The carts were large enough to fit a family of five, a…

The Second

Asking someone if they’re going to have a second child is like asking a shark attack victim if they’d like to take a dip in the frosty waters off the South African coast wearing a seal outfit bathed in bloody tuna.

A Letter to Our High Maintenance Roommate

When evaluating any typical roommate situation it is best to find those who respect your privacy and don’t sock you in the family jewels or poke you in the eye with a toy train track when you’re not looking. We missed adding those disclosures to our lease. Learn from our experiences in this post.

Introducing a new column: “Get Styled with Beer Styles” Issue #I: Blonde Ales get to have all the fun

Welcome to a new subset of the blog – a regular column, which teaches you about different beer styles. This concept was created by a newly hired team of well-oiled creative monkeys working ‘round the clock with one goal in mind – craft the greatest topic in Pampers N’ Pints history. Since the regular writer’s brain makeup has been compared to that of a monkey, very few will realize new writers have actually been added to the staff.